Silly Senior Pranks

Lucas Schaefer, Writer

What can you say about Oly High’school traditions these days? In a time when students seem more engaged in social issues than simple school based activities, we can’t even manage to go out and spray-paint the rock without someone arguing about white genocide or something. Dances are ignored, standardized tests are somehow even more loathed than before and a sea of tired students begrudgingly reach for the touch of a now washed up “spirit stick” almost monthly at sweaty assemblies. Betwixt all this school oriented mediocrity, can’t we as a student body focus on the one big activity we actually enjoy (that isn’t senior skip day)? I’m talking about the senior prank sister, a hit or miss but typically entertaining venture where seniors annually take it upon themselves to essentially just punk the school for a day.

The tradition of the senior prank well exceeds the lifespan of any current OHS employee’s career and while many today are lost in the annals of prank history, we at the Olympus have taken the liberty of organizing some of the more remembered pranks of Oly’s near and far gone past here for you today. Now wasn’t that nice of us?

Let’s start with the oldest one any staff member around here seems to remember and what OHS veteran Librarian Mrs. Koss-Warner can only say was “despised by virtually all the staff, not unlike most senior pranks really.” Before the school’s remodeling circa 1993 or so and apparently before Oly could afford video surveillance the Library was actually set upstairs. We doubt a prank of this magnitude could be pulled off today without some mass wiping of OHS’s camera footage cause for this one students actually snuck into the building after hours, disassembled a car that belonged to god knows who and reassembled it upstairs in the library. This is the kind of prank your dad would talk about when explaining to you how millennials today can’t prank like his golden generation and while it’s usually pretty hard to side with the whiny elderly, your dad is kinda right that prank totally kills and doesn’t compare anything we’ve seen in recent memory. It makes you wonder how the heck they even got it down? There’s no way someone actually fessed up to that one and just casually took it all apart again. Likely it was kept upstairs as an automotive shrine to prankery before the school could pay mechanics to hastily bring it all down and just leave it in the parking lot.

Coming back to a post y2k age a lot of students wonder why the pranks can’t seem to hit the sweet spot of actually being super funny. Junior Allison told us her “knowledge of the senior prank mostly consists of teepeed trees and letting crickets loose in the halls to get stepped on.” Because we don’t advocate lame pranks or animal cruelty here at The Olympus we’re not gonna go into these, although the theme of using animals in the pranks has been around for a while (ask your teachers if they remember the chicken one sometime). Shamefully the best prank in recent memory is probably the noxious fart balloons that got released into our hallways about 2 years ago. This wasn’t a dumb one for making the school smell like fart, because let’s face it, farts are funny I don’t care who you are, but because they got released into hall four, our science hallway. In case you haven’t wandered down hall four recently it already reeks of science; from Mr. Roth’s formaldehyde soaked pig collection to Mr. Bryan’s noxious scalp polish to whatever on earth Mr. Beeson keeps in his giant thermos. I guarantee that had those fart packets been stealthily hidden in lockers around the school or fired at a teacher from some band geek’s tuba, that prank’s memory would be inscribed on a plaque somewhere. As of this writing the 2016 prank (if there even is one) hasn’t happened yet but here’s hoping we think of something funnier than “egg the stadium”. Why not cover every doorknob in the building in honey or unscrew the nuts holding all the lunch tables together or use school computers to make every printer in the building spam naked pictures of David Hasselhoff? It can be done! I believe in us!